I thought I would be posting more, but first tri is kicking my butt.
The only symptom that's a problem is the nausea, and the nausea is a problem not because of its severity (actually, I have yet to have anything I eat make the round trip), but rather because it's almost all . . . day . . . long. Usually I get a reprieve of about 3 to 5 hours in the afternoon, during which time I try to get some work (meaning work for pay) done. And that's about all that gets done. That and sleeping about 10.5 hours per night. I'm even nauseated in my sleep, though, which gives me freaky dreams such as that my mouth is crammed full of chewing gum or marshmallows to the point where I'm in danger of choking--and no matter how much I pull out of there, it's still almost full. Good times.
I'm sure this will be twice as much fun next time, with a baby or toddler in tow. Ugh.
Which is kind of the craziest part--the way it messes with your head. Here I am trying to gear up to be in charge of a baby 24/7, and now I can't think of a time in the past five years where I've felt less capable of taking care of a baby. For instance, the thought of painting the spare bedroom and turning it into a nursery sounds completely overwhelming right now. Couldn't possibly do it. I have to remind myself that when we moved in here a year ago I painted four rooms and we set up the entire rest of the apartment. So intellectually I have to think that my normal self can probably handle the little nursery (and the baby), it's just that I'm temporarily a mess.
So this all came on fast and strong at 5.5 weeks, and now I'm 8.5. I think I'm halfway or a little more than halfway through this. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. Certainly this could all be worse. I don't have hyperemesis gravidarum or anything close to it. This is likely to go away after the first tri. I do have an awesome husband who listens to me and is good to me. When I'm not feeling sick I actually feel pretty optimistic. And even when I am feeling sick, I'm so freaking glad to be pregnant. I feel like my life is unstuck, like progress is being made on my goals. It's still better than the past year has been. If there's a baby at the end of this, then it's not too much to ask at all.
But it still sucks right now.
Currently: 8 weeks pregnant.
2 comments:
Be warned: I'm finally getting a chance to read through your blog, and I'll be leaving lots of comments.
This is fun -- it's like reliving the experience of pregnancy. It seems soooooooo long ago now to me ... approximately 1 million things have happened since the good old days when Greta was having morning sickness.
Right now, she's lying next to me with Seamus and just said, "He is so beautiful! I can't believe we made him out of just a sperm and an egg."
:-)
Oh yeah, and don't worry about not being able to handle taking care of the baby. No one can really handle it, but somehow it gets done anyway.
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