Oh hi! I didn't see you there. I was just practicing this new thing I invented--I'm calling it standing. I'm going to patent it and make millions--it's so handy for seeing things you couldn't see before. Like what's inside this toy basket, for instance.Or what's on top of the end tables. (Did you know that's where they keep the coasters and the remote controls?? Paydirt!) Or what's in Mom's lap. Whatcha got, Mom, huh? Is it a remote control? Let me see or I'm going to slobber on your leg. Just kidding . . . I'm going to slobber on your leg anyway.
Or for continuing my close inspection of all the buttons on the DVD player. The other day some sequence of button-pushing caused a drawer to suddenly open in the front of this thing! I didn't even know it had a drawer, and I could only look at it in shock! It was like pulling just the right book on a bookshelf and having the thing open up into a secret passage. Mom said a bad word and came over and did something to make it go back in. I'll have to figure this out sometime when she's not looking.
Also, standing helps in projecting one's voice when announcing that naptime is over. Be sure to face the door and sound pathetic right off the bat.
I'm still working the bugs out, though. Somehow there's a glitch where after you stand for a few minutes, something happens to make the floor rush up and smack you on the head and the world suddenly flips from vertical to horizontal. It definitely smarts, and I don't think standing will catch on with the public unless I can get that worked out. Thank goodness I was born with such a hard skull--I've been putting it to full use lately.
The other problem is that sometimes the longer you stand the farther apart your feet get. I don't notice them moving, but then there they are. Eventually that becomes distressing in its own way and I have no choice but to hang on for dear life and make some please-rescue-me noises to get Mom to rectify the situation. Here I'm not in too much distress yet, but in hindsight things are already past the point of no return:
This standing thing is going to be big, though--tell all your friends.
1 comment:
Cora's not a baby any longer.I've missed her growing up.
I liked the Cora-voice. She is a funny girl. Maybe I should get her a helmet and knee and elbow pads like a skater.
Now nothing will be safe lower than the top of the refridgerator. And maybe not that. Does she have a sign-on ID for your computers? Or does she just yank the cords. Wait 'til she uses her teeth on that thigh instead of sliming it. That will shock both of you.
I didn 't use Word; can you tell?
-Dad-
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